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Eric Stern

@eric-stern
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  • Profile Type: Regular Member
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  • Last Update: August 1, 2013
  • Last Login: August 1, 2013
  • Joined: August 1, 2013
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    • Eric Stern
    Posted in the topic Script Help for Short Film in the forum Screenwriting
    August 1, 2013 4:10 PM PDT

    I am beginning to write a script for my next short film and would love some input from others. Here is what I have. Please feel free to give me any additional ideas. I really want to make an extremely creative short -- something very original.


     


    The beginning of the film and the conversation starts on the back porch. The characters, ROBIN and PHIL, are in certain outfits that people normally wear at home while relaxing 

    Robin and Phil are sitting at the table and the conversation starts (WIDE SHOT). They both have something to say. Robin asks questions and Phil answers the questions (TWO SHOT). This is an opportunity for CLOSE UPS, MEDIUM CLOSE UPS, MID SHOTS.

    Then, Robin gets up and crosses off. Phil follows and their conversation continues. They turn a corner and then switch locations -- perhaps a school hallway or outside the school. Robin and Phil are dressed differently, and seemingly unaware that they've teleported (basically) to another location. Now Robin has coffee in his hand and Phil is smoking a cigarette. The conversation is narration -- so the new location is based off their discussion. 

    Let's say next they walk into a classroom, FROM THE HALLWAY. When they enter the Classroom they switch locations again. This time we're in a coffee shop or in a park. The conversation continues. Phil and Robin are in different attire and seemingly unaware that the location has changed again. 

    In the end, the characters are where they started -- your parents house, on the porch, sitting and having a conversation. The conversation ends, and since Phil was explaining something to Robin and we saw through their actions and the locations what Phil was trying to say, Robin is convinced. 

     


     


    Please let me know what you think. Thanks.

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